Client: Melissa, author of Psychobabble
Presenting Issues
- Client reports coping with several simultaneous and exciting-yet-stressful transitions: relocating to another state, becoming a mom, and choosing to temporarily leave the workforce.
- Client reports sleep deprivation-induced ice cream binges, inability to wear pants, and a profound loss of sanity.
Client History
- Client is a Licensed Professional Counselor who enjoys connecting with people, long walks on the beach, and Freudian slips.
- Client reports being born and raised in Northern California and desperately misses it after relocating to the Portland, Oregon area.
- Client began blogging in 2012 in an attempt to appease the voices echoing in her head.
Mental Status
On a good day, Client can string together words to form complete sentences, prevents her two young children from killing themselves or each other, and showers. On average days, she demonstrates questionable judgment by wearing sweet potato puree and saying it’s good for the skin…and hair…and inner ear.
Client appears moderately manic at times, especially when rage-cleaning the kitchen while yelling at the Kardashians on TV and binge eating cheesy blasters.
Client is only a danger to herself or others if there is a shortage of goldfish crackers in her household.
Diagnoses
- Severe Theobromine Dependence, Type I
- Social Anxiety Awkwardness
- Moderate Introvertism
- Acute Mama-itis
Treatment Plan
- Blog regularly, with additional middle-of-the-night rants as needed.
- Continue current ice cream regimen.
- Attempt to wear pants at least three times per week, weather permitting.
Now eat this gouda and call me in the morning.
Now I really like you! We have a lot in common, not to mention I live in Corvallis. And I miss northern Cali more than anyone will ever know.
I ache to be back in California……
Love the blog! I like creative about me pages, rather than the ordinary “This is me, now deal with it.” sort of thing.
Thank you. Took me a while to come up with the idea.
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M- if you are willing, I’d love to have your email. I have a wonderful article I want to send to you. xo Dawn Or, friend me on Facebook (Dawn Quyle Landau).
psychobabblepants@gmail.com
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The Steinem´s quote… excelent election for many bloggers, I think!
I identifify myself with it
Excelent blog Melisssa
Thanks!
Love your blog!! Love the insight from a therapist. My mother-in-law and sister-in-law are both therapists and it seems I can never get enough of their stories, insight, and perspective. Looking forward to reading more of your posts!
Great, thanks!
Hey, You, came to your blog via word for worms…just wanted to say I admire your style of writing…funny and serious is a great combination.
Thank you very much!
Hahaha… I had a hearty good laugh.
So I am not the only one who struggles to seem sane ;)
Excellent :)
My random blog surfing brought me to yours, and I am very happy it did! A great read and I look forward to your future posts!
-Andrew
Thanks! Glad you found me!
I just happened to stumble across your blog…and was immediately fascinated…thought I was the only marginally insane person around :) I only had to read your about me…and I was smiling already :) nice blog, I’ll defo stick around and read more :)
Aw, thanks so much!
You’re one therapist I wouldn’t mind being friends with! :P Congrats on the wedding…I was just married last Valentine’s Day. MArried life is difficult, but so amazing at the same time!
Congrats to you!
Thanks for reading.
(We can be blog friends if you’d like…)
:)
that would be awesome!
that would be cool!
I love your blog along-with the amazing title..!
Keep up the good work! :)
Thanks!
Just found you and now I am never letting go…. wait, that sounds terribly creepy and slightly insane. I work in child welfare.. my kids are your clients. We could share a book list like no other. Thanks for making me laugh. I have three cats and I sing to them daily. I had to get rid of my bed frame and put the mattress on the floor so they would stop hiding every time I tried to sing to them. Since we removed the bed frame one has taken to licking the blow dryer.. while it is on. Apparently I have that effect on cats. Thanks a bunch for the laughs!
Right back at ya, because your comment made me laugh!
I could have sworn I was following you already? And in the back of my mind I think I just thought, “Wow, Lyssa doesn’t post much”? I suck. Sorry. Also, your kitty is adorbs.
Kitty owners unite!! Yours scares me sometimes.
I really like your bride on the couch picture.
Why thank you!
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Hallo! I can’t find your contact details, but I wanted to send you a message. I’m putting together a blog entry on mental health professionals, blogging and personal/professional identity. Wondered if I could mail you for a few thoughts?
Sure! Psychobabblepants@gmail.com
I’ve nominated you for a Versatile Blog Award. Check out the deets here: http://thefoodiefarmer.wordpress.com/2013/01/16/huh-who-knew/
Thanks!
You are a hoot! You are as quick as a 100 mph fastball and you really shoot from the hip. Love your writing!
Thank you! I stole some blood from Annie Oakley in another life and injected it into my veins. I highly recommend it.
I’m here to stalk you courtesy of Le Clown. Good deal on the newly acquired license!
My 19 year old daughter was drugged and raped in August. Thankfully she FINALLY began regular sessions with a therapist, courtesy of her university’s health care clinic. She is doing so well :)
Moi also suffered a sexual assault at about her age. Never reported it or received help.
I applaud you, it must be horrible and hard on your psyche to deal with victims of trauma each day. A cat always helps. Not to mention the cheese. Mmmmmmm cheese. Especially during crap TV shows.
Be well and take care of yourself. You are an asset to humanity, truly.
Thank you, and I’m glad to hear your daughter is getting support. I did a post on taking care of myself called ‘Fill Your Bucket’ if you’re interested.
going to search your blog and find it. Thank you so much :)
Love the pic and the about. I wish I could be funny, but I’m not. Too intense I guess. Oh yeah, I’m over from Le Clown. He does have good taste. Keep it up. You made me laugh. Thanks :-)
He has impeccable taste, indeed.
Glad I make you laugh!
Over from Le Clown’s to look around. Nice cat!
Thanks! She’s a cute terror sent from Hell.
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A bazillion thank yous for my Festivus gift. It is incredible.
Yay! I am so glad you liked it! I drew it during some downtime at work and had a lot of fun with it.
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I’m having a Festivus party on my blog! I want you there!
http://notthehardestpart.wordpress.com/2012/11/26/you-are-cordially-invited/
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Awards! I’m giving them to you!
Lyssa,
Have you given up on the hopes of appearing on my blogroll? Please say it isn’t so… There’s still three days to make up for lost time…
http://clownonfire.wordpress.com/2012/08/31/roller-giraffe-contest
Le Clown
I very much appreciate you going out of your way to encourage me!
I make attempt a late surge….
I am an official armchair psychologist and one of those examples of how a little psychology knowledge can be a bad thing. I love analyzing everything. I’m currently reading The Psychopath Test. It’s fun when people at my workplace ask what I’m reading and then slowly back away when I tell them.
Ah, yes. I know the slow backup move quite well.
Thanks for liking a recent post of mine – I’m glad I found your blog! Love it and will definitely be stopping by often. And PS congrats to you and Brian!
Aw, thank you muchly!
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You are having a lovely blog. I too love cheese.
Why thank you. Cheese deserves a national holiday in my pants.
the blog title itself is an attention grabber :]
your new follower from the Philippines :]
Thanks so much for the follow! Glad you like my blog!
I was hanging out with a wee baby this afternoon and I could NOT stop staring at him and making faces and cooing noises! Yes, babies have the power to transform me into some sort of human pigeon.
They do have magic powers. So do maternity stores, for that matter. They have their own gravitational force.
Great page! I write sonnets about how much I love cheese.
Haha, good to know our devotion is well documented. Thanks for stopping by!