About Me: A case study

Client: Melissa, author of Psychobabble

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Presenting Issues

  • Client reports coping with several simultaneous and exciting-yet-stressful transitions: relocating to another state, becoming a mom, and choosing to temporarily leave the workforce.
  • Client reports sleep deprivation-induced ice cream binges, inability to wear pants, and a profound loss of sanity.

Client History

  • Client is a Licensed Professional Counselor who enjoys connecting with people, long walks on the beach, and Freudian slips.
  • Client reports being born and raised in Northern California and desperately misses it after relocating to the Portland, Oregon area.
  • Client began blogging in 2012 in an attempt to appease the voices echoing in her head.

Mental Status

On a good day, Client can string together words to form complete sentences, prevents her two young children from killing themselves or each other, and showers. On average days, she demonstrates questionable judgment by wearing sweet potato puree and saying it’s good for the skin…and hair…and inner ear.

Client appears moderately manic at times, especially when rage-cleaning the kitchen while yelling at the Kardashians on TV and binge eating cheesy blasters.

Client is only a danger to herself or others if there is a shortage of goldfish crackers in her household.


  • Severe Theobromine Dependence, Type I
  • Social Anxiety Awkwardness
  • Moderate Introvertism
  • Acute Mama-itis

Treatment Plan

  • Blog regularly, with additional middle-of-the-night rants as needed.
  • Continue current ice cream regimen.
  • Attempt to wear pants at least three times per week, weather permitting.

Now eat this gouda and call me in the morning.


71 responses

  1. Now I really like you! We have a lot in common, not to mention I live in Corvallis. And I miss northern Cali more than anyone will ever know.

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  4. Love your blog!! Love the insight from a therapist. My mother-in-law and sister-in-law are both therapists and it seems I can never get enough of their stories, insight, and perspective. Looking forward to reading more of your posts!

  5. Hey, You, came to your blog via word for worms…just wanted to say I admire your style of writing…funny and serious is a great combination.

  6. I just happened to stumble across your blog…and was immediately fascinated…thought I was the only marginally insane person around :) I only had to read your about me…and I was smiling already :) nice blog, I’ll defo stick around and read more :)

  7. Just found you and now I am never letting go…. wait, that sounds terribly creepy and slightly insane. I work in child welfare.. my kids are your clients. We could share a book list like no other. Thanks for making me laugh. I have three cats and I sing to them daily. I had to get rid of my bed frame and put the mattress on the floor so they would stop hiding every time I tried to sing to them. Since we removed the bed frame one has taken to licking the blow dryer.. while it is on. Apparently I have that effect on cats. Thanks a bunch for the laughs!

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  10. Hallo! I can’t find your contact details, but I wanted to send you a message. I’m putting together a blog entry on mental health professionals, blogging and personal/professional identity. Wondered if I could mail you for a few thoughts?

  11. I’m here to stalk you courtesy of Le Clown. Good deal on the newly acquired license!

    My 19 year old daughter was drugged and raped in August. Thankfully she FINALLY began regular sessions with a therapist, courtesy of her university’s health care clinic. She is doing so well :)
    Moi also suffered a sexual assault at about her age. Never reported it or received help.

    I applaud you, it must be horrible and hard on your psyche to deal with victims of trauma each day. A cat always helps. Not to mention the cheese. Mmmmmmm cheese. Especially during crap TV shows.

    Be well and take care of yourself. You are an asset to humanity, truly.

  12. Love the pic and the about. I wish I could be funny, but I’m not. Too intense I guess. Oh yeah, I’m over from Le Clown. He does have good taste. Keep it up. You made me laugh. Thanks :-)

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  18. I am an official armchair psychologist and one of those examples of how a little psychology knowledge can be a bad thing. I love analyzing everything. I’m currently reading The Psychopath Test. It’s fun when people at my workplace ask what I’m reading and then slowly back away when I tell them.

  19. Thanks for liking a recent post of mine – I’m glad I found your blog! Love it and will definitely be stopping by often. And PS congrats to you and Brian!

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  21. I was hanging out with a wee baby this afternoon and I could NOT stop staring at him and making faces and cooing noises! Yes, babies have the power to transform me into some sort of human pigeon.

Babble at me:

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