Nolite te bastardes carborundorum

You guys, I am so fucking pissed I don’t even know where to start.

As a courtesy, I’m going to say now that this post is about politics and I’m extremely liberal and I also am not looking to debate right here, right now. If bearing witness to my rage is not your cup of tea, then by all means, please stop reading.

While I am not surprised by today’s news, I am beyond angry. Throughout this process (and that’s using an extremely polite word for the fucking power grab of a shit show the past few weeks have been), I’ve been angry with Republicans. They’ve lied about their intentions and they’ve cheated and they have undermined the democratic process. They do not represent the majority of Americans because they have engineered election outcomes. The people (read: not all Republicans are liars and cheaters) who have done those things don’t deserve to have power and don’t deserve my respect, at the very least. At the most, they deserve to be held accountable to the fullest extent of the law.

But. Today, I found myself en fuego with rage at another group. Senate Democrats, but also Democrats in power. Why and how didn’t they fucking stop Barrett’s confirmation?! Why is it that Republicans continue to steal cookies from the cookie jar and never get the fucking time out from Mom? What. in. the. actual. fuck.

You know what this reminds me of? When I worked as a counselor to children who had just recently escaped domestic violence in the home, most often perpetrated by their fathers and endured by their mothers, do you know who the kids were most often angry with? Their mothers. They were angry because their moms couldn’t prevent the violence, couldn’t stop the violence, and often, in their minds, allowed the violence to continue. Other factors played into this: Their moms were a safe place on which to place their anger, and rape culture/violence-against-women-and-children-culture is SO embedded in the fabric of our society that these kids grew up taking it as a matter of fact that dads hurt moms and kids, so why get angry at something that can’t change?

Before I digress too much: if you haven’t figured it out yet, for me, today, the Republicans are the abusive dads and the Democrats are the victims/bystanding moms. And I feel like the powerless kid, watching everything unfold and having to endure the lifelong consequences and trauma. Fucking fuck, Mom. After so many hits to the head, I just want you to metaphorically kick Dad in the balls and TAKE THE POWER BACK.

I’m sick and tired of Dems posting shit to social media about how we need to dig deeper and don’t stop fighting and, of course, vote them out. These words have become profoundly empty in the cycle of violence we have been forced to endure.

You know what?! I do vote. And I march. I’ve done what I can in a rigged, fucked up system to get progressive people in office. I’ve done my part. And now, IT’S YOUR TURN. You know who is supposed to fight for me and my views? YOU. You know who is supposed to represent me in government? YOU! And yet, I don’t feel my values represented. Since this is coming from me, a privileged white woman, I can only imagine how women of color and other minority groups feel.

Don’t you dare tell me to keep fighting, when you’re the ones we collectively elected to do the fucking fighting. I realize that Dad is ultimately the one to blame here, but for fuck’s sake, he has proven time and time again that he can’t be trusted to govern the household with love, dignity, and respect. Kick him out of the goddamn house and start protecting your kids.

It’s for this reason that shows like The Handmaid’s Tale are so popular. The adaptation of June, the handmaid who gives zero fucks, is the personification of our collective rage. What we wouldn’t give to be able to shove the fucking Commander down the stairs, or run over a shithead with a car, because that’s exactly what he deserves and no one else is going to do it.

I don’t condone violence. My point is that my rage, and the collective rage I feel with other likeminded individuals, is so powerful and so intense that it hurts. There is this primal yearning to see those abusing power to feel just as powerless as the progressive masses feel right now.

It’s getting harder to bear all this injustice, especially when I know that the repercussions of today’s events will stretch out far into the future. It’s far from over and I’m so exhausted. I’m angry and scared beyond words can say.

And I’m especially sick and tired of waiting for people in power to do the right things.


4 responses

  1. I very much share your rage, but also feel entirely powerless to do anything about it. (Except vote, of course, which I did as soon as possible.)

    I’m in favor of bringing back the guillotine for the various and sundry crimes being committed by those with (R) next to their name… but we don’t have time for rational solutions.

  2. Well firstly, the democrats in power are outnumbered. I didn’t sign any of the petitions against her confirmation because it didn’t do any good before when I signed them to stop Kavanaugh. They have the senate, the democrats can’t stop them without taking the senate, and kicking 45 out of office. They don’t give a flying fuck what we want or how we feel. I think there needs to be much, much, stricter rules, laws about who is allowed to even be nominated to a lifetime supreme court seat. Thomas and Kananaugh should not have even been allowed to be nominated in my opinion let alone confirmed. 45 had so much against him when he first ran I thought how is he even running? We need to have laws/rules the preclude people such as him from even running. We need to change the laws, and to do that we need to take back the senate and keep the house. We need to change laws about the redistricting that has allowed them to cheat so profoundly in the first place. We need to do away with the electoral college and let the numbers be truly represented. Like you, I am filled with rage, and ill over it all. My daughter has married into a right wing hillbilly family that laugh at my demise due to this administration. I have lost a lot. Now 45 has signed on to an anti abortion coalition with dictator authoritarian countries. I don’t know where he gets off when it’s legal here and that stance is not supported by the masses. But he thinks the rules don’t apply to him, and so neither do his followers think the rules apply to them. Justice would be 45 actually having to pay for his crimes, and his crimes being blared in the faces of all those that supported him. It is really tough right now to stay positive. Good things can happen, we saw it with Obama, but even he could do little with the senate blocking his every move. It’s a wonder he managed the ACA and it was gutted compared to what it was when it was first proposed. All the concessions that had to be made to get it through made the original barely recognizable. We have to start at the local and state levels and get more progressives elected, and slowly but surely change the make up of elected officials nationwide. We will see much change if we can hold the house, get rid of 45 and take back the senate. Hang in there. We really have no other option. My heart is with you, and I share your outrage!

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