We Put Birds On Things!

I have a big announcement, you guys.

Guess what, Psychos?!

This shit is happening, y'all.

This shit is happening, y’all.

Portland, Oregon is about to get a little bit crazier, folks.

The story is that Brian got his dream job, and this is our time to pick up and move to seek new adventures!

You hear that, World?!

This is our time!

I can’t wait to sign up for clown school and sit around eating vegan muffins on my days off.

But, in all seriousness, I am excited, but I am also scared and sad and anxious.

We’ve been living in the same place for the past 5 years, and this has been the longest time we’ve been in once place since leaving our childhood homes to go to college.  We can’t believe our luck in how our lives just fell into place here in Northern California.  We both found jobs in our fields, we found a town and an apartment we both love, and we were close to our families.  Even though we’ve been complaining about living in an apartment, living in a college town with noisy shitheads, complaining that we’ve learned all we can from our current jobs…I’m scared that we won’t have such good luck again.  This had to be a fluke, right?  Couldn’t have possibly been from hard work and compromise…that would just make too much sense.

This is also the first time I’ll be moving and not have something waiting for me on the other side – either a job or school or family.  That’s scary for me.  I’ll be supported by my husband, and while we both accept that and it’s what we signed up for, I’m still used to pulling my own weight.  For the past 5 years, I’ve been 100% financially independent for the first time in my life, and it’s felt pretty damn fantastic.  I know I won’t be giving up freedom, but I feel like I’ll be giving up a little bit of pride…at least temporarily.

There’s also the logistical aspect of this freakshow in getting all our shizz up to Razorblade City.  I never moved as a kid.  When I was 3, my parents moved us into the house that they continue to live in to this day.  My soul will shrivel up and die if they ever sell it.  Seriously, I’ll chain myself to the front door.

Anyways, the point is that I don’t really know how to move.  I hate moving.  I also hate feeling like my stuff owns me, and right about now I am finding out that I have a crapton of stuff.  The stuff outnumbers me; it could totally bury me and claim my life and make it look like a freak accident.  We’ve made the hard decision to have movers pack our stuff for us, because there’s no other way we’re taming this domestic jungle.

And then there’s the cat.  She’s only been in a car 4 times, and each of those times, she’s howled like a banshee going through a meth withdrawal, save for when we’re stopped at red lights.  I don’t know why, but I love this furry poosack like nothing else, and those screeches just cut straight through my heart.  The only solution – she’s getting doped up.  That’s right, Poopstick, you’re going to get high and you’re going to pass out so I can drive you in peace for 10+ hours.  You are not going to piss in my car.  You’re not going to throw up the meds.  Don’t make me regret signing up to be your human mother.

So there you have it.  I know the excitement will grow on me once I get past the hairy logistics.  I have a feeling we’re going to jive really well in the land of evergreen trees and unicycling hipsters – where composting is mandatory, where food is delicious and organic and plentiful, and where people suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder (named SAD for a reason) and will desperately need my services.

Please hire me, Portland.


Please also like Psychobabble on Facebook.  It’s where young people go to retire.


27 responses

    • YAY!!! I thought I remembered that you lived in Portland, but didn’t want to make any assumptions.
      I would love to meet up once the dust settles in my life….which will be like never. So we can meet when I am still a hot mess and that will be fine.

  1. Hey, you-
    Your “About me” said it was okay to call you that…it also said you love to travel…so travel, girl! You’re young, intelligent, witty, and a host of other positive things…Experience Portland…nothing’s written in stone-if you don’t like it, or hate it, travel on to another place. I envy you guys.
    Best of luck!

  2. I sometimes wish my life could be like this post . . . moving off a remote but civilized part of the country (with lots of trees) with my (nonexistent) family to start my dream job. I can see why you named the blog psychobabble. :) Those are very nice thoughts though.

  3. MAZEL!! There are several things here that shook me up… put top of the list, you live in N. CA??? Shit! I would totally have crashed your wedding and sat with you aunt, if I’d understood that. I somehow thought you guys were in Iowa or Ohio… Good Lord, I don’t know why I thought that, but I did. I’m in Bellingham, WA, so you will be a day’s drive now from me. We could totally do a blogger meet and great. I love Portland and you would love Bellingham; no one doesn’t. We have a sweeeet guest room. So, see, you do have something, someone waiting for you… sort of. ;-) All kidding aside: moving can be scary. I hate upheaval, myself, and can empathize with all the anxiety of all that change. However, you and Brian are forging your life as a married couple. When my husband started residency, a year after our marriage, and we had to move from CT (near both families) to Chicago, near no one, I felt much the same way. But that adventure, together, really forged a sense of “us,” that nothing else had. Best wishes and happy trails. I’m serious… meet and greet!

  4. Exciting/terrifying stuff! I’m going to be moving next summer as my boy has a job in a different city, and I’m nervous about going as I don’t have a job there (yet) and I don’t know anyone there and it’s a bit ugly there. But reading this has reminded me quite how huge america is, and this city I’ll be moving is actually only a 2 and a half hour drive from where we are now! But I’ve never had to move for someone else before so it feels like quite a big deal, having to modify my living and work plans to include someone else. Change can be a good thing, new opportunities ahoy!

  5. Congratulations! Moving sucks, but it’s a temporary state. And while it may feel like you’re landing without a net, you do, in fact, have a net in your husband, your education and professional experience, and general awesomeness. Those things will get you through. I am so jealous… Portland is such a cool town!

  6. Oh my gosh! Congratulations to Brian AND to Portland for getting such an awesome couple as new residents! I am a little jealous you’re moving there. Portland is by far my favorite town made popular on a skit comedy show on IFC.

    I feel you on the moving. It can be really stressful to not know what your next step is. We have resolved to leave our town next summer no matter what, and I know it’s serious this time because my husband has already told his school he will not be returning in the fall. It’s scary to jump without a net, but I keep telling myself that when I am most scared and uncomfortable is when I really grow. I am going to tell you the same thing. You will find a job in Portland. You’re too awesome not to.

    • Thank you for reminding me that I’ll grow from this!
      We’ve gotten very comfortable in our town, and we’ve realized that we’re no longer being challenged. We’re ready for bigger and better things!

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